Nothing Forbidden Read online

  “Katie, I’m not here to pressure you into anything,” Nadia said. “I’m not Chloe...”

  Katie snapped out of her defensiveness. The woman sitting across from her wasn’t Chloe. She may have been just as beautiful, and certainly just as sexual, but she wasn’t a schemer. She was her friend, and she would always put Katie’s best interests first. Any ulterior motives of Nadia’s were entirely about bringing more “fun” into her friend’s life. They just happened to disagree on how to define “fun.”

  “I’m sorry, you’re right,” Katie said at last. “But I made a promise to myself never to do anything to risk what I have with Max.”

  Nadia nodded, clearly biting her tongue.

  Katie followed her logic—mostly because she’d also been down this road. All she needed to do was recall her conversation with Max from a couple weeks ago. He’d told her she could have slept with AJ back then, without his permission. He’d told her that would have been sexy. She ignored the memory, forging ahead.

  “Look, I’m just not ready to go there,” Katie said. “Maybe one day we’ll be as comfortable with that as you and John, but I don’t know...”

  “Fair enough,” Nadia said. “More for me if I don’t have to share him with you.”

  Katie laughed, although she still felt the twinge of irrational jealousy. “Pretty sure you’ll still be sharing him with others.”

  “You’ve got a point there...” Nadia fingered her phone, then said, “So you really don’t mind?”

  “If you saw him again? God, no. I mean, I didn’t even know his name until now.” Katie said it almost as much for herself as for Nadia. Then, she joked: “Why? You have a date lined up with him tonight?”

  Nadia bit her lip, looking down, then back at Katie.

  “You do!” Katie said, more surprised than anything. “With him? With AJ?”

  She still didn’t associate the name with the man, and it was easier to think about Nadia fooling around with AJ than the guy she’d encountered in the alley.

  “Well, I was out already. You usually turn in early. So I figured, why not grab a drink with him?” At least Nadia had the grace to look sheepish.

  “When?” Katie asked.

  Nadia checked her phone, then flashed Katie a wincing smile. “In about five?”

  “Calling things close.” Katie chuckled wryly.

  “You’re welcome to join us,” Nadia offered, more as a consolation than a genuine offer of a threesome.

  “I’m going to pass. But thanks.” She reached for her wallet, pulling out a credit card. “Split the tab?”

  “Hey, Kates, you’re not upset, are you? Because seriously, I’ll tell him to fuck off if you’d like. He’s not worth our friendship.”

  Katie softened, once again reminding herself that this woman was a friend, not a rival. This was why she always got along with guys over girls.

  “No, have fun. I’m sorry I’m being...weird.” She tapped Nadia’s phone. “Don’t let a cock like that go to waste because I kissed the guy once upon a time, and have no intention of doing more.”

  “You’re sure you’re sure?” Nadia asked.

  She wasn’t. “I’m sure.”

  But she wasn’t.

  “Then let me pick up the tab. The rest of my drinks will be on AJ, anyway.”

  “Have fun tonight, whore,” Katie said with a laugh.

  “Have fun wishing you were me. Night, Kates.”

  That statement was packed with so much truth that Nadia had no idea. Or maybe she did.

  On her way out, Katie passed AJ. Or a guy who approximated the memory she had of him. He’d grown his dark hair out and buzzed away the sides, but the rest was how she’d remembered—same broad shoulders, same broad and broken nose, same self-assured smile.

  As they passed, their eyes met. He regarded her with confused recognition, unable to place her but sure that they’d met. She nodded and smiled back, then slipped out into the night, pleased with herself. If he’d not recognized her at all, she would have been hurt. If he’d placed her immediately, she would have been mortified.

  She pulled out her phone and started a text to Max.

  –you’ll never believe who I just ran into...

  Chapter 3

  “So his name is AJ?” Max asked with a smirk.

  They were sitting at the kitchen table, drinking coffee the morning after she’d been out with Nadia. Light poured in through the large bay windows, filling their recently remodeled kitchen with light.

  Max had come home after she’d gone to bed. So the conversation had to wait until the next day, which was unfortunate for Max since Katie was so horny that she was ready to explode.

  “Yeah. He’s apparently an AJ,” Katie said.

  She’d filled him in on most of the details. He’d listened quietly, asking only a few clarifying questions. Katie got the distinct impression that she was proving to a disillusioned kid that Santa Claus was indeed real.

  “And you just ran into him?” He scratched the side of his face. “Huh...”

  “What?”

  Max shook his head, reaching for his coffee. “Nothing. Just seems so...convenient is all.” He sipped, but the smirk remained.

  “You don’t believe me!” Katie said, putting it together.

  “No, no, it’s not that.” He laughed. “Well, I kind of don’t.”

  Katie laughed with him. “Whatever. It doesn’t really matter what you believe.”

  She stood and went to the counter to refill her coffee—feeling his eyes follow her as she did. She’d worn her black satin nightgown with the white lace fringe.

  “So are you going to see him?” Max asked, although she wasn’t sure whether he was humoring her or not.

  She poured her coffee and added cream, thinking about how to answer that. The truth was a resounding no, of course, but she was pretty sure Max didn’t want to hear that. Holding her coffee to her lips, she blew across the steamy surface. “Maybe I have already...”

  It was a lure for her husband, but he didn’t bite immediately. She could see the giddiness he was trying to hide behind his ever-calm demeanor. “Go on,” he said.

  She watched him watch her. He observed her as a stranger would—as AJ would. She could practically picture herself the way a new lover would: tall, willowy curves, creamy skin dappled with freckles, sheathed in a satin slip negligee that did fantastic things to her breasts. The short hem just barely covered the tops of her thighs, and even her husband seemed to be willing it shorter.

  Katie shivered with excitement. She set her mug behind her, leaning back on the counter, her hands clutching the edge.

  “Maybe when he saw me, he recognized me… Stopped to say hello. Invited me to stay with him for a drink.”

  “Maybe he did,” Max said. “But what about Nadia?”

  “Oh, you know Nadia. She’s a good friend. Made some excuse to leave us alone.” Katie wasn’t sure that’s how it would go down, but when she saw the cloud of doubt fall across Max’s face, she wondered if he actually believed her. “And when we were alone… Well, things picked up just where we left them.”

  “You found an alley to make out in?” Max’s jovial nature had begun to falter.

  “We didn’t need to. The booth was private enough.”

  Max rose, pushing his shoulders back and puffing out his chest. He worked out when he had time and had a nice body—not as nice as AJ’s, she couldn’t help thinking, but comparing him to a personal trainer’s physique wasn’t fair. He wore a t-shirt and a loose pair of pajama pants, which were tented with his excitement.

  “I can imagine it was,” he said. “Did he kiss you?”

  “Mmm hmm.”

  He stepped close, wrapping his arms around her tenderly. It was comforting, having him so close. She could smell the coffee on his breath. She could see the flecks of gray in his day-old beard.

  “And you let him?” he asked.

  “Want me to show you how?”

  She leaned in and pulled his mouth down to hers. Their lips crashed, opening to one another, tongues ready to unfurl. She balled her fists in his shirt, feeling his body heat beneath her knuckles.

  He kissed her back, just as hungrily. Was he thinking about her with another man? Yes, of course he was.

  Something about that inflamed her. She hated it. Hated that he had that kink, and yet she couldn’t stop help teasing him about it.

  Max broke the kiss. He grabbed her by the hips and turned her to face the counter. A window looked out on their quiet street. The gauzy white curtains gave them enough privacy, but this close to them, she could see the world beyond them. A couple walked their dog down the other side of the street. Mrs. Thompkins was working the flowerbeds in her front yard as usual, despite it being October.

  Behind her, Max lifted her negligee to her hips. He touched the smooth petals of her pussy. She was soaking. What did he think about that?

  She moaned as he sank two fingers inside her. She bent forward, bracing herself on her elbows. She felt his free hand on her tailbone, holding her steady as he started fingering her. He knew exactly how to touch her, how much pressure she liked, and how to twist his fingers to get her off. Her body rippled with pleasure. She loved how well Max knew her body.

  “What are you thinking about?”

  You, she didn’t answer. He didn’t want the truth right now, although she almost gave it anyway. Instead, she pushed his buttons as surely as he was pressing hers.

  “Comparing your technique with AJ’s—” A moan cut her off. He curled his fingers across her g-spot, his thumb rotating around to play with her clit.

  “And?”

  “He’s good. Different. Harder.”

  Max fingered her harder. She bit her lip, feeling an orgasm build. She i
magined AJ’s powerful body behind her, finger-banging her, calling her a slut for wanting it.

  “Yes...” She moaned, turning the word into a multi-syllabic warble.

  Yes, but no. She didn’t want that. She wasn’t a slut. She was a woman who’d one day be like Mrs. Thompkins out there, sturdy in her old age, with a rich and full life behind her.

  AJ’s fingers left her for a moment—no, Max’s fingers. Her husband’s. She protested, reaching behind her to bring them back. She was so close. Her fingers found his cock instead, erect and ready.

  “Let’s compare something else,” he said.

  She helped him guide his cock against her pussy. He entered her with ease, filling her like no other man could.

  “You feel so good, baby,” Katie sighed. “So big!”

  She wasn’t lying. He felt fuller than usual, turned on by the fantasy.

  “As big as your lover?” he said. He let her get used to his cock with slow, languid strokes, when all she wanted was for him to take her.

  “No,” she said. She thought of the photos on Nadia’s phone. “No, he’s bigger.”

  The truth just came out, and only when it did, did she hear how bad it sounded. She braced herself for the hurt to follow, or the anger. Instead, Max clamped down on her hips and drove himself deep, hitting spots that he normally couldn’t reach.

  “You like bigger, don’t you?” Max’s voice felt like it was hundreds of miles away. The man entering her, fucking her, pummeling her g-spot with each thrust, was not him. Was someone else. Greg, for a moment, then AJ with all the muscles she’d seen on Nadia’s phone, with that glorious cock shaved bare like some porn star.

  Katie hung her head between her shoulders in those last moments before her climax. Her hair shimmered around her, the auburn catching in the morning sun. Mr. Thompkins had joined his wife, knotted hands clutching a rake as he set about dealing with the leaves. Traffic began to pick up as families started their Saturday morning rituals.

  Katie saw none of it. Behind her tightly shut eyes, she was consumed with the stretch of AJ’s glorious girth, and the way he rammed it deep, again and again.

  She took one last breath before her orgasm crashed through her, turning her world on its head. She felt his come flood her, hot and so naughty. So profoundly wrong.

  Her moan seethed through her clenched teeth. Her face scrunched up, a grimace that embodied everything that she felt about this fantasy—pain, disgust, and lust despite it all.

  The orgasm subsided at last. Max withdrew with a groan from them both, and he was Max once again. She clutched the kitchen counter, uncertain that her legs would support her. Max was there, wrapping her up in his arms, holding her close.

  “I love you so much, babe,” he said.

  Even through the haze of her orgasm, she felt her anger flare up. Anger that this fantasy made him love her more. Anger that he had the fantasy at all. Wasn’t she enough? Why did he want more?

  She kept those thoughts to herself.

  “We should probably go pick up Mya from your parents’ house,” she said instead.

  “Right. I’ll go. You take a shower.”

  Further conversation on this subject could wait for another day.

  Chapter 4

  But that day wasn’t the next day. Or even the next week. Life returned to normal. Or normal-ish, anyway.

  Max managed his bars, which were doing very well. He was considering opening another Callahan’s, possibly in another city, but hadn’t given it much thought beyond a what-if.

  Mya had started kindergarten, which seemed crazy to them. Katie joined the PTA at her school, and wondered every time she attended a meeting what dirty little secrets the other moms had—some of whom were attractive in that affluent suburban way.

  At work, she began an audit with a new client—a nonprofit without a big staff but with a surprisingly complex ledger. She typically worked from her office, but a few clients like this preferred that she work on premise. She didn’t mind it as long as it didn’t require her to travel—a deal-breaker for her. It let her get out of the office and change things up.

  Change things up. Was that really what she was looking for? The past year had already been a whirlwind. She didn’t think that she could take any more change, and yet she couldn’t look at a good-looking guy without wondering what he was like in bed. It didn’t help that most of those guys looked at her the same way.

  “We’ve put you up in one of our smaller conference rooms,” said Bradley Spencer, the CFO for IMBARK. “It’s not big, but you have a window.”

  “Don’t worry about me,” Katie said. She glanced at Bradley as he led her through the office—a surprisingly well furnished space for a nonprofit. Bradley had nice shoulders and a nice head of hair. She put him around her husband’s age—late thirties, maybe forty. She wondered if he worked out, then forced herself to think of anything but that. “I was once given a closet as a work space. As long as I have access to coffee, I’m good.”

  “Oh, we’ve got you covered there.” He waved at a break room along the back. “We’ve got a Keurig machine in there, piped into a water supply. And of course there’s the Starbucks downstairs.”

  He led her down a hallway lined with offices. “Here we are,” he said, opening one of the last before the hall turned the corner. “Your home away from home.”

  Bradley wasn’t kidding about the size. It wasn’t a closet, but it couldn’t have been large enough for more than three people to squeeze into. That said, the window was nice.

  “Nice view,” she said, setting her satchel on the small table and going to the floor-to-ceiling window.

  Bradley stepped up beside her. She wore heels, but the CFO still towered above her, his shoulders even with her eyes. She liked that.

  “I like it, too,” he said, confusing her for a moment. Had she spoken aloud? Her face went red before she realized that he’d been talking about the view. “It’s a nice reminder of why we work in the city.”

  IMBARK was on the corner of the block, occupying the third floor of the new, all-glass office building. The conference room looked out over the perpendicular street from the one she’d entered. Shops and restaurants lined the broad avenue, and just across the street was the downtown location of City Fitness.

  Katie’s heartbeat jumped. Wasn’t that where Nadia said AJ worked? She scanned the second floor, where tall windows allowed her to look right into the row of treadmills that looked out on the same street.

  “City Fitness. That must be convenient,” she said when she didn’t see Nadia’s lover.

  “It’s a nice facility. They’ve recently renovated it, too. I could probably get you a company discount if you’re interested in joining.”

  That was an intriguing but dangerous thought. “Thanks, but I actually prefer yoga studios to the gym.”

  She felt Bradley’s eyes sweep over her, managing to keep her smile to herself as she pretended not to notice. “So let me go get my computer and I’ll show you where we keep all of our files,” he said.

  “Sounds good,” Katie said. He started to leave when she stopped him. “Bradley? Could you also bring some coffee?”

  “Of course. Anything else?” He smiled at her. She wondered what he’d think about her if he knew the dirty things she’d done—and then wondered if he had any secrets.

  “No, I’m good for now.” God, she really needed to get her thoughts under control.

  ****

  Her job at IMBARK was pretty standard. Most of the grunt work had already been done by a team of junior accountants. As a senior manager, she was responsible for reviewing the work papers. Nonprofits could be tricky in the way they reported things, and she’d run into more than a few situations where contribution accounting got dicey. Some nonprofits also played fast and loose with the reporting of their investment portfolio, particularly in a down market at audit time.

  So she’d look over the work papers, ask Bradley, or one of his assistants, to bring her the paper trail detail if the notes were less than clear, and she’d make sure everything was kosher. It wasn’t the most stimulating job—especially when doing it alone—but Katie didn’t mind it. There was something comforting about looking over numbers and making sure everything added up.

  And the window into the world outside helped pass the time.